Humor is more than just surprise or a violation of expectation.

Defining humor is not easy

Humor is considered as a subject with no particular subject. Psychologist says it’s the most complicated thing to define. They can define happiness, anxiety, depression, loneliness and even love. But, when it comes to the laugh, they drop there weapon because they are out of ammunition or any rational theory. Let us first ask ourselves, what humor is? We would agree on one thing that humor is a surprise or violation of expectations. Isn’t it? We laugh on the things which did not occur in a usual way or incongruent. For instance

“When I see lovers’ names carved in a tree, I don’t think it’s sweet. I just think it’s surprising how many people bring a knife on a date.”

“I asked my daughter if she’d seen my newspaper. She told me that newspapers are old school. She said that people use tablets nowadays and handed me her iPad. The Fly didn’t stand a chance.”

Take another one “Oh darling, since you have started dieting you have become such a passionate kisser…                                                                                                                                                                                              What do you mean, passionate? I am looking for food remains!”

Here, we see the answer is a bit different. Although, we know the answer will be unexpected yet we laugh. The problem with focusing on just these violations of expectations, though, is that there are many events that are unexpected or surprising, but not funny.  Winning the lottery is wonderful and surprising, but not funny.  Likewise, getting hit in the back of the head with a snowball while walking down the street is painful and surprising, but not funny.

We see now why it’s difficult to define humor.  What differentiates funny things from merely surprising ones is that people find humor in what they call benign violations.  A violation is a failure of expectations about how things are supposed to be.  Benign violations are ones that make people uncomfortable, but ultimately are safe.

Some events are just genuinely unexpected or surprising.  Others involve a strange juxtaposition of things that should not belong together.  For example, the latest advt. of mosquito killer is coming with the smell of “Tulsi”. I mean, what’s wrong with you guys. So, in BJP era “Tulsi” is the new “Rose”. Next time if you want to give a rose to a girl, better give a “Tulsi”, maybe “Romeo squad” can leave you intact. Patanjali’s toothpaste is now the top-selling brand, it comes with black pepper, cardamom seeds, cinnamon, cloves, and ginger etc. I don’t know if it can cure all the mouth problems, but most certainly can make a great masala tea. People are rushing to buy Patanjali’s FMCG products as if they are not products but “Prasaad” given by Baba. Like consuming them will cure all there ailments, because its baba after all and we know how dear are they to Indians. The most surprising thing of all, PNB still showing home loan advt. with easy terms too.

We have heard the more sense of humor one has, the more he will be considered intelligent. It’s not a fact though, but definitely one would stand apart in the crowd who can laugh others. One would have more developed linguistic and observational ability and for that one must live in the moment. Isn’t it. But sometimes, when a group of people can laugh at your humor, on the other hand, some can be offended by it. So, self-deprecating humor is the safest, when you make fun of yourself, few if any, people are offended. Self- deprecating humor shouldn’t impugn your character but focus on your unique behaviors, experiences, or missteps. Disclosing missteps that don’t demean your character can add to your likability because minor mistakes humanize a speaker. For instance

“Two days ago, my friend Peter ran off with my wife.

Oh no, how long have you been friends?

Since two days ago.”

“I managed to lose my rifle when I was in the army. I had to pay $1000 to cover the loss.
Now I’m starting to understand why a Navy captain always goes down with his ship.”

In recent time with the blast of the internet, the rise of comedians is on a peak. It’s not surprising that a stressed person who just came home from his office will switch to a comedians show on internet or TV. So, a happy man would spend less time with these shows compare to a depressed man. Of course, it’s my assertion, but if psychologist fined any interest in this topic, I’m pretty sure I would be right to a great extent.

So, telling a joke is easy but make people laugh is a herculean task. So, here we go
I Googled “how to start a wildfire”.

I got 48,500 matches.

A child’s observation: “If a mother laughs at dad’s jokes, we have guests.”

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